On Life’s Terms

The concept of truth and law has forever appealed to some part of me that seeks an anchor. Truth and law, in my perspective, share this quality of immutability. Truth cares not at all what anyone’s opinion of it is, nor does it care if it is denied outright or perverted. It remains impervious to influence or time. It stands unchanged.

Something I say  often is that true laws are not broken. We don’t break the law. We break ourselves against a law.

This can comforting idea has carried me across more than one tide of a raging sea of human created storms of emotional insanity. My own, but more so those of others. Women in particular seem implausibly unaware or uninterested in the very real fact that our emotionally charged behaviors have an impact on the people and circumstances in their environment. Usually, the fallout has negative effects that go both unacknowledged and unaccounted for.

Partially so..accountability falls instead to someone else who must shoulder the aftermath of another person’s emotional life.

I am not suggesting that this tendency towards emoting is bad in and of itself. What is bad is the associated tendency to both deny this fact and to not be responsible for how it impacts others.

Men give women great feedback all the time that is wasted on denials and resentments that could instead be used to expand understanding, practice self control and generally, be happier.

I have been working construction jobs that have really pushed me physically and mentally. I’m finally returning to my pre-illness weight and muscle tone but it’s more taxing than it was a few years ago.

This is because of one of life’s truths: as time progresses, our bodies change as we pass through the seasons that will eventually become our demise. Living things get old and die. By the grace of God, that is if not cut down sooner by accident, injury or illness.

 

Simple truth. Not pleasant, yet undeniable.

Because of my work, I engage with both younger men and those about my age every day. I take this opportunity to talk about relationships to women and what’s going on in their lives. Many are single dads.

One of my signature lectures is about choosing t